You know the old saying — there are two wolves inside all of us and they both really want some White Castle. It's safe to say that anyone who's smoked or vaped at some point in their life knows the call of munchies. When you're high, basically anything sounds good, but not everything is going to fill you up the same way. While we're not here to dictate what you can and can't eat, we are here to make a few suggestions. Here are some of our favorite post-session munchies for the true connoisseur of junk food to enjoy.
Is there anything more perfect than a nicely frenched fry? Probably, but in the context of munchies, that list is pretty short. Fries are easy to get, easy to cook, and easy to eat no matter how much you've been vaping, so it's no question that they should end up on your munchy menu. A crispy, extra salty fry is great on its own or dipped in basically anything. Grab a few bags of frozen taters or swing by the drive thru of your favorite restaurant for six or seven extra large orders, and you'll be set.
Everyone loves pizza. If you're in the mood for something cheesy, saucy, garlicky, crusty, and several other adjectives worth of goodness, there's really no other choice. Easy to eat no matter how much you've been smoking, there's never a bad time for this Italian treat. The versatility of pizza also works in its favor, since you can load your pies up with plenty of toppings. If you can make your own, you can even drop in some really weird combinations that nonetheless sound pretty good after a few puffs, like potatoes, chips, cookie pieces, or whatever else your mind can conceive of.
No session would be complete without something sweet (it rhymes, so you know it's true). There's plenty of amazing sweets out there that you might want to munch on after a few puffs on your vaporizers, but one of the best has to be raw cookie dough. All the flavor of chocolate chip cookies with the consistency of something like ice cream. Sweet, soft dough with crunchy chips is always great, but it's even better when you can really enjoy that texture contrast after a vape session.
Stoners and Funyuns go together as well as stoners and...well, basically everything else on this list. Even so, Funyuns are an obvious choice to be here, as you probably know. This simple yet delicious snack is a crunchy compliment to your session, providing some extra oniony flavor that you don't normally find in the standard potato chip. Their ring-shaped design makes them a fun snack to look at and eat, too. You've also got a great way to scratch that spicy food itch thanks to the Flamin' Hot variety.
Macaroni and Cheese
In terms of being a vehicle to shuttle melted cheese into your mouth, macaroni's been a star for well over 100 years now. The trusty blue box stuff is more than easy enough to make while you're high and provide a squishy, cheesy blast of flavor you can eat right out of the pot. It's pretty easy to mix in some flavor boosters like sriracha, pretzels, chips, chopped up green onion, bacon, and plenty more. As customizable as it is simple to cook, mac and cheese is your friend even when the rest of the world couldn't care less about you.
We all need to work on staying hydrated, but especially when we vape. That stuff dries out your mouth and throat something fierce, so have plenty of drinks on you when you're smoking. One of these should definitely a slushie or ten, as there's hardly any drink better than artificially flavored and colored ice slush. Slushies sit comfortably in between a full frozen drink and a soda and pack tons of flavor, making for a really pleasant textural drinking experience while sucking down tons of sugar. They also take really well to alcohol if that's your thing, though even if not, you can find them sold in a ton of flavors and even make your own if you can work a blender.
Nachos are an extremely versatile food and a stoner staple as a result. While using the oven successfully might seem like a Herculean task at times, it's more than worth it when you can completely destroy some hot tortilla chips and cheese. One of the biggest benefits of nachos is that you can make a ton of them on a single sheet tray, another being just how much stuff you can pile up on that tray. Swap out the regular chips for some Doritos, use some of every kind of cheese in the fridge, toss on the contents of about 20 Taco Bell tacos (and eat the shells while you wait), or whatever else your addled brain can imagine in the heat of the moment. You can even try some downright strange combos like chocolate nachos, nachos with other snack foods like Cheetos instead of chips, nacho lasagna, and tons more recipes that should never see the light of day.
Hear us out on this. Yes, cooking a whole steak right is A Task for someone who's just smoked a bowl. Yes, that is way too much of a production for when you've got the munchies. Yes, this is strange. But imagine sitting down in front of a nice t-bone and just tearing it apart with your hands while Spongebob plays on TV. Even more than it is delicious, it's just pure fun. If you've got leftovers from a steakhouse just sitting in the fridge, toss them in the microwave and have at it. Just don't forget a big heaping bottle of ketchup on the side.
Everyone who vapes can appreciate the experience of chowing down on all their favorite junk food from time to time. The next time you've got the munchies, try some of the weird, wild, and wonderful foods we've listed for you here if nothing else seems to be scratching that itch.
Though we can't really help you in stocking up for your next session, we definitely can provide you everything else. Lighter USA has one of the largest smoking and vaping gear selections online. Check us out to find your new favorite vape.